Ever since I wrote this post I have been lighting a little candle on my serenity altar. I have been feeling so restless of late, seeking something I can’t quite put a finger on. I have been praying for a little clarity…, to understand what my heart is yearning for so that I can make her happy.
A few nights ago, I was leaning over to light the candle and my eyes fell on the picture that my friend Pat had given me for Chinese New Year.
It is difficult to tell what it says from the photo here so let me transcribe it here:
Seeing the small is called Clarity
Keeping flexible is called Strength
Using the shining Radiance
you enter the Light
where no harm can home to you
This is called Enlightenment
– Lao Tsu
Sometimes the universe needs to just hit me over the head. I have been looking for clarity in the big, wide and sweeping instead of in the tiny. But isn’t it true that real clarity only comes in little portions, tiny moments when it all seems to make sense?. Isn’t it true that that we only understand when we explore the intimate, intricate details of any one thing or person or feeling.
I realized that in my haste to catch up with my life–my life that had felt as though it had galloped away from me while I was so tired– I had stopped noticing the small. I wasn’t doing my morning pages. I wasn’t taking photos. I wasn’t doing yoga or knitting or my mediatation work–all things that help me break down life into the tiniest of bits to appreciate each square inch of beauty. I was all full steam ahead, big picture, getting lots of stuff done.
So this week I am resolving to think small. To find my clarity in all the tiny little bits